To care for ourselves is our number one priority enabling us to be the best that we can be. This is the position we choose to live our life from; where we are in charge and at the helm of our ship or driving our own bus of life. We think yes, all is well and on we go, we make decisions to support this and some days feel on fire with clear focus and direction. Then some days we feel that ‘life’ just gets in the way, the sea becomes rocky with the storm that brews. If it’s not work, it will be the household chores, or looking after children with being the taxi driver, the coach of the chosen sport and then there are the parent-teacher interviews. We teach our children right from wrong, up from down, dollars and cents, 1 + 1 = 2 and how to think outside the box when it comes to putting a round peg into a square hole. We love and adore them and look after them when they are sick, learning to walk, on their first date and much, much more. We wouldn’t change it for the world.


Its not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. Its a necessary.”

– Mandy Hale


So how do we change this on again, off again feeling of loss for ‘the life’ before?  How do we stay on track for achieving our own dreams and goals? How do we keep the house in an order that we are comfortable with? Of course we are proud and thrilled to be a parent. It’s just some of the time, the out of balance overwhelm can rush up when we least expect it or we can feel it building day by day. It can even drive us to want to tear our hair out, jump up and down, scream from the mountain top or just have a good old cry. Inner peace, calmness and yes balance is something we strive for. How do we create exactly that and carve out some joy for ‘loving ourself’. When we love ourself our energy shifts, our whole vibration is nicer and calmer when connecting with people including our children. We actually come from a nice place, a less stressful place and a more accepting space. When choosing to operate from this space, life runs smoothly.


The dictionary adjective for smooth is; to be smoother, smoothest; these are free from projections or unevenness of surface; not rough. Allowing or having an even, uninterrupted movement or flow. Easy and uniform, as motion or the working of a machine. The adverb is, in a smooth manner; smoothly. With this in mind, what is it that creates the opposite in our life right now, you know the one that is giving the result of it being interrupted in the movement or flow of our life? What makes it the opposite to a smooth manner? When we get clear with what we have, we can vision the change we wish to have.


What if our life could actually be a little more organised? What if the ridges, wrinkles and difficulties could be lessened? How would it be if these could be shared? What if it could create a pocket of calmness and peace once a day, once a week or even on a more regular basis than what we have now?


Planning will support any type of new behaviour. Deciding to take on a new plan, decision, direction and/or action will fully support this new behavioural direction. So what is it that we would like to do to start creating more of today and more for our future?


We all secretly know what we want to do, even if it’s just in our imagination right now, we all know. To create just one small space for us to declutter our mind, unwind from the day, week or even month, put our feet up, smell the roses or reconnect with mother earth, we simply need to make a new choice.


Listed below are some suggestions to support us along the journey:

  • Decide to start doing things differently for ourself – have a mantra/affirmation similar to ‘I will make time for myself’, ‘I love and honour myself’, ‘I am worth it’. Once we have given ourselves permission to do this, opportunities and possibilities open up.
  • Practice ’10 Breaths’ – breathe nice and deep, in and out, counting from 10 down to 1 on each out breath. This can be done when we wake up, going to sleep, waiting at the traffic lights (even if only 4-5), every little bit helps.
  • Reflect – nice and quietly, allow the thoughts to float into your mind and body when in this quiet state,
  • Practice yoga, Tai Chi or do stretch classes – this slow movement supports exercise, strength and mindfulness,
  • Meditate alone or with a class,
  • Be playful, have fun, be present – “It’s never too late to have a fabulous childhood”,
  • Re-connect with ‘Self’ – do something special for ourselves, take in a movie alone, go away for the weekend alone, take a bush walk, or walk along the beach,
  • Find a special retreat that will support growth and nurturing,
  • Work with a coach to put in some boundaries and move forward with life,
  • Turn the phone off for periods of the day or a whole day over the weekend!
  • Be Grateful for life – reflect on what has been good throughout the day – say it out loud or write in a journal, start with listing 2-3 and increase regularly. The more we are grateful, the more will come.


“The best project youll ever work on is YOU.”

– unknown


Debbie Hogg

Debbie Hogg  

Debbie Hogg is one of Australia’s leading coaches PCC/APC, is an award winning Coach, Master NLP Practitioner, Speaker, Women’s Retreat Master, Writer, Podcaster, Adventurous Hiker and is The Self-Worth Coach. Debbie is passionate in helping women manage their ‘Inner & Outer’ balance. She is co-creator of Life Skills Programs, assisting parents teach children confidence and resilience. Debbie knows that when we give ourselves permission to fully show up in our life amazing serendipities occur! She is mum to two amazing teenager daughters // www.debbiehogg.com