The frame for this article is about a conversation I had this morning walking along the pier. “Morning”, I said to two guys, who regularly sit and look at the boats and drink coffee. They sit in the same place every time I see them. Today I stopped for a longer chat.

I asked how often they came? “Pretty well every day”, one said.

“Do you ever get tired of looking at this one view”, I asked.

“No we love it”, the other guy said. We continued chatting and I discovered they were both on disability pensions and this is what they had to look forward to, they loved looking at the boats and chatting to people who came past.


I asked if they were there yesterday because it was really windy and one of them said, “Yesterday, were we here yesterday? One day becomes the same to me”, one of the said.

I then asked them, how long they had been coming here for?

“6 years”, one replied.

I felt my insides tense in amazement, “6 years”, I repeated making sure I heard him correctly.

“Yep, 6 years and pretty well every day”, one confirmed.


I had to ask, what would happen if you went and found something else to do, gave yourself some variety and then each day wouldn’t blend so much?”

“Yeah, that might be okay”, one replied.

“I said, what about Kings Park overlooking the river’.

“Yeah, that would be nice, haven’t been to Kings Park for 20 years”.

“You might even like to go for a walk around the gardens”, I said.

“No, no walking for me, I can’t walk”, one said.

We finished off saying have a great day and see you again.


As I walked away, it reconfirmed how strong our thoughts and words are we use for our self. If we tell our self we cannot do something, then we will not be able to do it. This is how strong the power of our words are.


“If you think you can, you can. If you think you can’t, your right.” – Mary Kay


The more we hear the negatives in our head the more they keep us stuck. Stuck in our own stuff and we go around and around. It becomes the same old thing every day – stuck going around. It’s like ground hog day, same stuff, different day.


We can move our self from any type of stuck-ness. Firstly we need to know how we feel about our sameness or stuck-ness, and then we need to know what we would rather have. Once we have this, we can do something about it.


Here’s an exercise to assist in overcoming the ‘Stuck-ness’ and moving onto ‘Flow’.

  • Close your eyes:  Take a deep breath: Repeat two or three times, getting more comfortable and letting go of all thoughts: Now, create a picture in your head of what you would like to have the flow look like. (it will be the opposite to the stuck-ness).
  • Make the picture exactly what you want it to be, (use your imagination to create it – remembering it’s all yours and you are in control).
  • Make it bright and colourful – make it as real in your mind’s eye as possible.
  • Now, add some sounds, what can you hear going on around you? Is there any music, people’s voices, sounds in the environment? Add them to your picture.
  • Now, feel how it makes you feel. Feel the feeling of ‘now having this picture as part of your life’, part of your normal day to day running of your life. Feel what it feels like.
  • Now, sit with this feeling for a bit of time.
  • Breathe this in, nice and deep – breathe in deeply again.
  • Know, you can have this. Know, this is yours!
  • Take another deep breath and open your eyes, coming back into the now.
  • Smell the different things around you and become present.


We all have the ability to make different choices to give us something different if this is what we want. Firstly it starts with new thinking. Our new thoughts will give us a new behaviour, our new behaviour will give us new and different results.


Your beliefs become your thoughts,

Your thoughts become your words,

Your words become your actions,

Your actions become your habits,

Your habits become your values,

Your values become your destiny.

Mahatma Gandhi


Debbie Hogg

Debbie Hogg  

Debbie Hogg is one of Australia’s leading coaches PCC/APC, is an award winning Coach, Master NLP Practitioner, Speaker, Women’s Retreat Master, Writer, Podcaster, Adventurous Hiker and is The Self-Worth Coach. Debbie is passionate in helping women manage their ‘Inner & Outer’ balance. She is co-creator of Life Skills Programs, assisting parents teach children confidence and resilience. Debbie knows that when we give ourselves permission to fully show up in our life amazing serendipities occur! She is mum to two amazing teenager daughters // www.debbiehogg.com