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With the magazine theme of ‘Celebrations’ this month, I thought I’d share with you my new-age rules for planning a children’s birthday party. Here goes:

  1. If your child can’t walk they probably aren’t going to remember the party. Make the photos look amazing and don’t stress out if they sleep through the event.
  2. Serve takeaway/pre-made or heat-up food… If it has sugar or pastry in it, or at least looks bright and yummy and unhealthy, it’s usually a winner.
  3. Don’t invite more kids than you can handle. It’s not a popularity contest and there’s no need to be overrun by little people just as the cake arrives with flaming candles.
  4. Remember that if you invite a child along to the party, there is every chance your kid will be invited to their celebration – no tooty horns in the lolly bag.
  5. Make the lolly bag impressive but not boring – you don’t want your kid to be remembered for the barley sugars in the bag.
  6. Teach your child to be thankful for gifts, and don’t let them rip the present apart before it hits the table. A crazed child covered in wrapping paper and sticky tape clutching at a gift is not a grateful child.
  7. Serve food, tea, coffee/hard liquor to the parents.
  8. Outsource children’s entertainment. No one needs to see your impersonation of Iron Man or The Hulk… Especially if you’re the mum.
  9. Have already visited the bottle shop and stocked the fridge for when the party ends.
  10. Take a game idea from my father in law: Get a jar of 5 cent pieces, throw them in the air and scatter them in the backyard. Sit back and watch the “Finders Keepers Game”. Fun.
  11. Think about whether or not you really need to admit you bought the cake.
  12. If you’ve been invited to a play centre party with large slides and inflatable things, make sure your eldest child (husband) knows that the activities are just for the kids.
  13. Put an end time on the invite, so everyone knows how long they’ve got.
  14. If your child is under the age of around 12, it’s not right or polite to dump them at the party and head off to the gym/piano lessons/pub/bed.
  15. If having the party at home, block off areas or even the whole house. It’ll mean less cleaning, less worry and less stress.
  16. Try not to play favourites during musical chairs or pass the parcel, even though your personal opinion might want to sway you a bit. Just because you don’t like little James doesn’t mean he should miss out.
  17. Know that things will go wrong and something will break, spill or pop. Expect the unexpected.
  18. Remember your smile – the party is also a celebration of the fact that you got this far as well!
Moyra Major

Moyra Major  

Moyra has been a familiar voice on Gold Coast radio for over a decade. Throughout her career in radio she's had the pleasure of interviewing people from all over the globe and has even appeared on the Ellen DeGeneres Show in LA. She loves speaking in public, whether it be through the radio or in front of an audience. But she wasn't always very good at it. Moyra finetuned the skill, starting her own business, Major Confident, in 2015 to those like her who struggled to face an audience // www.majorconfident.com