Every other day you’ll see someone on social media declaring “I don’t want to adult today”. Fair enough. When I read that kind of remark I always think that I’m generally bang up for some adulting, it’s just the ‘mothering’ that I’d be happy to give a miss sometimes. Now, before you call child services, let me explain. I love my two girls and I love being a mum. Full stop. But what they didn’t explain in antenatal classes was that being a mum would be akin to being a 24-7 project manager. There is just so much thinking involved – and that’s the part I’d be happy to give up every now and then. Case in point: Any full family expedition. Beyond my own requirement to shower, dress and do my face there’s just so much to manage. It’s a common joke in my home that hubby has three jobs in this situation: Grab his iPhone, his wallet and meet us in the driveway. I, on the other hand, will have to perform a search mission of our home to find the three specific clothing items that my mini fashionistas require to complete their outfits. I’ll do everyone’s hair. I’ll readjust the large child’s hair as she’s fussy. I’ll find a missing wallet. I’ll iron something. I’ll lock all the doors and windows. I’ll make sure the dog has water, remind someone to feed the fish. I’ll check the doors and windows again #becauseOCD. I’ll pack water bottles for the car because someone is always thirsty. I’ll pack snacks – just in case. I’ll have the directions for the drive already plugged into my Maps app. I’ll have bought, wrapped and packed presents (if required). I’ll have prepared a plate of food (if required). Then I’ll turn on the TV so the burglars think someone’s home. And I’ll probably also straighten the lounge cushions and tidy the coffee table because I’m in the vicinity. Then I’ll scream at the large child to get away from the mirror and exit the building so I can lock the door and check the locks a third time. While this is one occasion, I’m also the chief family thinker for all things related to school, groceries, paying bills, our pets, running my own business… argh!

Remember my hubby: iPhone. Wallet. Driveway. He’s seriously so lucky he’s hot.

This Mother’s Day, while the tradition is for a Tiffany-blue box (and I’m not complaining!), I’d simply be happy not to do the family’s thinking for once. I’ll grab my wallet and iPhone and meet Y’all in the driveway.


Belinda Glindemann

Belinda Glindemann  

Belinda knew she was destined for a career in communications and publishing from the age of 11 when her Year 6 teacher introduced her to poster projects and glitter pens. She completed her journalism cadetship in the Whitsundays and went on to hold various newspaper and magazine editor roles across Brisbane in a media career spanning more than a decade. When Belinda's not writing for haven, she runs her own PR agency, kid-wrangles two young daughters and drinks way too much sweet tea.