Mums, don’t think that it’s only on Mother’s Day that you are allowed to put yourself first. A happy mum usually maketh a happy family unit.
Ancient Chinese wisdom recognises that mothers are the root of the family tree. Her energy is the stabilising force that keeps the family emotionally secure and whether or not family members are aware of it, children, grandparents and, yes, even husbands all unintentionally drain the mother’s energy.
Mothers (as with all people) only have the emotional energy to give that they have in reserve themselves and unfortunately in our busy modern world, mothers often don’t replenish themselves adequately. This can leave them feeling depleted and emotionally exhausted and with a much lower tolerance for life’s usual day-to-day frustrations. In this tired state, the enjoyment of family life can fade or even feel downright miserable.
Mothers, please spare yourselves a few minutes this Mother’s Day to think of how you best rejuvenate yourselves and top up your energy tank. We all regenerate differently and sometimes you can be so tired you can’t even remember what you used to do for fun, prior to children. Ideas can range from exercise and creative pursuits (like painting to learning a new language at a weekly night class) or meditating. As long as it is purely for you, it doesn’t matter and the sillier and more fun it is, probably the better.
Unfortunately in our Western world most women have been taught that focussing on your own individual needs is selfish and something to be discouraged. This inaccurate mindset has done a lot of damage to Western family culture and added to the risk of depressive episodes in women.
The happier mum is, usually the happier the whole family unit is, so implore all mothers out there to spoil yourselves this Mother’s Day and every day afterwards – even if only in a very small way. You have a responsibility to yourself and your family to be the happiest and most nourished you can be.
Words // Dr Elen ApThomas