The seemingly elusive ‘happiness’ goal is one of the biggest subjects ever written about, and it appears as the one goal most difficult to achieve.
I will be happy when – my taxes are done, I lose weight, move house, travel the world, have a baby, start a business, declutter etc. Happiness seems to be a neverending story and an extremely personal one. To some, it is their life’s purpose. To others, it is something they compare and measure against. Happiness is difficult to define because we are individually unique – your happiness may not be someone else’s. Our personal values, beliefs, ideas, life experiences and lessons are influential to our life path. If happiness is so important, yet so difficult to define and even achieve, what will it take to create satisfaction? What if it was easy?
Is happiness a choice, a knowing or a feeling? Is it something we have when things are going well and then ripped away when in dire situations? Is it related to our health? Could it be permanent? Is it something other people can give us, contribute towards, or is it our responsibility? Is happiness a choice and, if so, whose choice is it?
It’s number-crunching time. Yep, the end of the financial year is here. So how would it be to do a ‘self-audit’? What would it be like to jump into the next financial year with a more positive mindset? Rather than asking the question, “Why me?”, flip it around to better questions.
Top 5 strategies for your EOFY self-audit
1. Give up – ‘Being right’
It is natural to defend our point of view because we want to be heard. However, appreciating other people’s models can be advantageous. Learning to ask questions, to work as a team and understand the end goal will change relationships and how we feel. Question: What if I let go?
2. Give up – ‘Need for control’
Take a break and be gentle on ourselves. Know we cannot control everything. The only thing we can control is us. Other people are not in our control. Anything considered outside influences are out of our control. Family/partner decisions, moods, choices, needs are all individual to them. We have ownership of ‘self’, be comfortable with this and watch the change. Question: What do I want?
3. Give up – ‘Blame’
Blame is debilitating. Choosing to play the blame game is below the line. It’s instantly choosing to be a victim. This does not support us in any way. Choose to have good thoughts creating uplifting and empowering feelings. Choosing to play above the line is 100 percent supportive. Question: Who am I?
4. Release – ‘Labelling’
Letting go of other people’s expectations and rules is life changing. To be somebody who someone else wants us to be is exhausting and unauthentic. It keeps us trapped and stunted as if our wings have been snipped and are unable to fly. Statement: “I Love Me’
5. Release – ‘Negative self-talk’
How we speak to ourselves governs our life’s pathway. Telling ourselves we are not enough; we won’t be. When we use negative language to describe our abilities and feelings, it will be so. A negative and positive are unable to operate in the same space, therefore, a choice must be made. The choice is ours. Do we continue to allow negative energy to flow, or do we consciously shift things around? By making small changes, life will become different. Question: How will one small change affect us as a whole?
We are all special human beings, and the way we see and communicate with ourselves determines the quality of our lives, relationships and, of course, our overall ‘happiness’. The key is self-love. The more we love ourself, the better we are at taking care of ourselves and others, and the more we contribute positively to the universe. The higher our vibration is, the more we will attract. Rather than think we can’t or it’s too hard, choose to look at situations in perspective, see how this helps or alternatively work together on solutions. The biggest driver is ‘self-love’ and acceptance. Next, is knowing what we truly want, and being crystal clear on this. Have a beautiful clear vision of what we want to create and go for it.
At the end of the day, week, month or year, we get to make choices. It is up to us to choose our own happiness. Being comfortable and happy with our choices are the only things we are in control of, and it is life-changing. It offers peace and our life back.
“Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.”
– Marthe Troly-Curtin