“Sometimes you need to be alone in order to reflect on life. Take time out to take care of yourself. You deserve it.”
– Robert New
Ah, the tired feeling comes up again and it takes longer to go away this time. Things irate us and we don’t understand why. It’s frustrating and we find it happening more regularly and it gets harder to kick than before. Slumped in bed at the end of the long day we might even drift off into a mini fantasy about time off the treadmill, running away and escaping all our responsibilities (for a short time). This might include dropping the children off at their grandparents’ place or friend’s house, or even driving off into the early morning sunrise and leaving everyone at home with dad. Whatever it is, the family is safe and we take off for a couple of days. Then, the alarm goes off and it seems like Groundhog Day has hit again.
Responsibilities sit deep in our core and we take them seriously. Looking after our children and family to the best of our ability is important. Doing our best with work, keeping fit and healthy, keeping house, supporting children with homework and extracurricular activities. Having children’s friends over or driving them to some gathering. Looking after elderly parents, doing the housework, shopping and gardening. These are responsibilities we all have.
Females are very good at putting ourselves at the end of the responsibility list. We tend to do everything for everyone else and our needs are a lower priority. Here’s a question though – why does the in-flight demonstration always recommend parents put on their oxygen mask first? The reason is to look after our children and others around us. If we made sure everyone else was okay before putting on our mask, we could actually suffer in the process; then who would look after our children?
According to Wikipedia, “Burnout is a psychological term. It refers to long-term exhaustion and diminished interest in work. There are negative outcomes relating to burnout, including job function (relating to performance, output etc), health-related outcomes (increase in stress hormones, coronary heart disease, circulatory issues) and mental health problems such as depression.” Some questions to ask ourselves include do I feel pressure often and do I take on too much work and not ask for help?.
Our busyness unconsciously impacts our communication, therefore impacting directly on our relationships. Our thoughts often get in the way and we think it’s unfair for us to have time out. As the burnout term states, there is a high probability it can impact directly on our health and we can end up unhappy deep within. If we are unhappy it can lead to our body being at ‘dis-ease’. When our balance, our body, our life isn’t at ease it creates ‘dis-ease’.
Consider for a moment how it would be to take a break, revive and then jump back into life all topped up again. What feeling came up with this thought?
Back to reality and we find ourselves at the end of another long day, we are exhausted and the fantasy begins again as we fall asleep. We imagine taking a couple of days out. We feel ourselves walking on the beach, with the sand squeezing between our toes – the smell of the ocean and the waves gently rolling onto our legs as we lose ourselves in time and space. Oh, the feeling of being topped up by the simplest of things such as taking the time…
We might feel the revival of energy as we sit beside the river and watch the water gently flowing downstream. The fantasy could be about sitting on a balcony reading a riveting novel, or simply resting and connecting with self. Whatever it is for us, this disconnecting is vital to our overall health and wellbeing. But, back to reality as the alarm once again wakes us and, hello, Groundhog Day again.
Questions to start your self-nurturing break process:
- Where would I go?
- How long would I go for?
- What would I do?
- What would it give to me and my family?
- What do I need to ask for?
- Who can support me?
- How much would I spend?
- Do I prefer the sea, the rainforest or the city?
- If I don’t do something different, what will I have in two years’ time?